People seem to think that their life is meant to be spectacular; like they’re going to develop a life changing product or win a Nobel Peace Prize. But what if you don’t? Does that mean your life is worthless? Of course not! But if you’re like most people, you want your life to amount to something.
I’m this way. And my husband. We want to make an impact.
Herein lies the problem. Where my husband doesn’t know what he’s “meant to do” with his life, my interests lie wide and varied and I often try to do them all at once and failing miserably at all of them – or being so overwhelmed as to what to do first, I don’t do anything.
So here’s the thing; I need to give things up in order to get ahead. I know this isn’t the first time I’ve blogged about this but it goes to show how easy it is to fall back into old patterns and how often even I need the reminder. As much as I write to (hopefully) give other people something to think about, it’s also a reminder to myself.
So what it breaks down to is this; if I’m focusing on half a dozen things, I may eventually succeed, but I need to find focus. Being a Gemini, this is really hard to do! My dad always used to poke fun at me – as there was always something new to catch my attention and not much has changed over the years. Yes, I have my art, but there is SO MUCH to explore with art and different mediums and techniques. I know I’ll never become a “world renowned” artist. Art will always be a part of my life but I need to create for the sake of creating, not to create to hopefully one day sell. No obligation. No stress. Art is therapy for me so it’ll always be there – and I’ll always have my IG page and my Ottawa Artisan’s shop but I won’t actively seek an art show – unless someone approaches me or I do a commission.
The one thing I’ve come back to over and over again through the decades is health and wellness. Since my late teens, I’ve always been drawn to health and fitness – and recently discovered the wellness part. I think it comes from this deep knowledge that without wellness in multiple facets of your life, you can’t have complete health.
Let me put it this way: you could have a “societal acceptable body” but if you have a poor relationship with food and exercise, you’re lacking wellness. If you’re a little heavier but have a good relationship with food and exercise, then you have more wellness – and this is where I believe I’m at. Yes, I’m heavier than I’d like to be, but my relationship with food and exercise are healthier than it’s ever been. Sure, some days are “better” than others, but that’s okay! Like today, hubby and I had ice cream (vegan, of course!) but I’m not going to punish myself for it!
Wellness encompasses so much more than diet and exercise. It includes sleep habits, personal growth, mental health, hygiene habits, personal relationships, stress reduction, meditation, healthy home, disease awareness and prevention, healthy aging, gratitude, goal setting, healthy coping mechanisms, time management and productivity…. the list goes on!
I realized back in Sept 2017 that I was trying to lose weight and work out for the wrong reason. I knew it had to do with what was going on upstairs in my head. I still went to the gym and went through the motions but my heart wasn’t in it anymore. I knew it had something to do with what was going on in my head and I worked really hard getting in a good head space. Every time I stepped on the scale or had to exchange my uniform for a bigger size, I had to check in with my mental health and I was still okay. Yup. Still okay! Even as I approached 200 lbs I remember thinking, “really? But I actually like how I look!”
Now, just because I like how I look doesn’t mean I don’t what to change! It’s the motives behind the desire to lose weight that matters! I don’t want to lose weight to “look better”, but for health reasons. My dad was overweight and had diabetes, high blood pressure, cholesterol, etc, and I was always frustrated that he didn’t take bigger steps earlier. However, that’s a child’s way of thinking (and I was a child at that time) now that I’m an adult, I realize how much more complex things are.
And this is what I want to specialize in – the mental barriers – and specifically around helping women overcome barriers with diet and exercise as that’s where my experience lies, but also in other aspects of wellness.
But everything I’m currently doing – or not doing – is getting in my way of succeeding! I need to stop looking at my unfinished art projects with guilt – that’s not productive – and find something more in line with my goals.
And that will help me get ahead.